Son of Grease
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"Score Tonight"

This scene at the bowling alley is full of priceless dialogue. Most notable is Johnny's comment to the T-Birds about Paulette, who wears gold lame hot pants and caresses her pink bowling ball: "Let's just say I'm giving her therapy for her disease--nymphoidmania." Also notable is Johnny's leering comment to Paulette when someone asks for the final score: "Final score happens later tonight."

Easily one of the goofiest musical numbers ever performed, "Score Tonight" features commercial-like close-ups of cheesy dancers looking at the camera. The cast of random characters includes several nuns and effeminate men with hairpieces doing acrobatic dances with bowling balls. The highlight occurs when Adrian Zmed emits a high-pitched wail while sliding down a bowling lane, then sings to Paulette while on his knees: "Hey Paulette, take a look over here. I'm your king-pin honey, and I'm gettin' in gear." This scene offers yet another opportunity for director Patricia Birch to go dance-crazy. The various routines feature dancers jumping and swaying while holding impossibly light bowling balls.

After the fun subsides, Stephanie again asserts her feminist desire to be free of Johnny's obsessive need for control, declaring: "I ain't no one's trophy."
Oooo, she ain't no one's trophy. So that's the way it's gonna be, huh, Miss Independent?
Yeah, independent! I kiss who I want when I want.

To prove her point, Stephanie threatens to kiss the next person who walks into the bowling alley. When the unsuspecting Michael receives this surprise kiss, Johnny is infuriated, and the plot thickens....

Act 2

As auditions for the June Moon Talent Show commence, Michael is recruited to play piano. This gives him many opportunities to admire Stephanie as she rehearses for "Calendar Girls" with the rest of the Pink Ladies. One of the more interesting talent show entries features twin cheerleaders singing their ode to "Brad," who is described as a "sensation in madras."

"Cool Rider"

Following one talent show rehearsal, Michael makes his move to ask Stephanie for a date. She turns down repeated entreaties and sings him a song about her ideal man--the "Cool Rider." As the first strains of the song begin, Pfeiffer is bathed in red lighting. Wearing a tight black outfit, she scales a ladder with cat-like stealthiness, and straddles it while singing lines like: "I want a devil in skin-tight leather" and "If he's cool enough/he can burn me through and through." Anyone who wonders why Pfeiffer was the only actor to become successful after G2 needs only to watch this scene.


Another classic musical number, "Reproduction" features Tab Hunter, camping it up as he did in John Waters' Polyester (1981) and Lust in the Dust (1985), as a slightly smarmy substitute biology teacher. This song features almost unbelievable lines like: "Make my stamen go berserk" and "I got your pistil right here."

"Who's That Guy"

It's "Cool Rider" to the rescue! After listening to Stephanie express her longing for a "Cool Rider," Michael begins his quest to become her fantasy motorcycle man. Exploiting his intellect by selling term papers to the T-Birds allows Michael to earn enough money to "invest in a cycle." Finally, after perfecting his biker skills and obtaining a large pair of motorcycle glasses to disguise his identity, Michael returns to the bowling alley as the mythical "Cool Rider." He vanquishes the evil Scorpions and wins Stephanie's heart, although she still doesn't know his name.

"Do It For Our Country"

DiMucci (Peter Frechette) and Sharon (Maureen Teffy) perform G2's eloquent political statement on the horror of nuclear holocaust. Hilarity ensues when a romantic encounter in a "nuculoid" fallout shelter becomes a sitcom-esque misunderstanding of DiMucci's dishonorable intentions.

Next Page: Act 3

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